Struggling

Some people takefor granted the small things. We are all too busy reaching for the mountain peak, that we don't pay much attention to the climb. How can you know happy without sad, and success without failure. Not every body has had to, but I have definitely struggled in my life. So I appreciate the little things.

Struggling

 

Let me tell you a little something about struggling

It’s not just having to eat syrup sandwiches because you can’t afford to go to the grocery store

Or even sleeping 3 to a bed under 1 sheet just to get a little heat

It’s not knowing where your next meal is going to come from

Or how long your shoes are going to last

Or how you gonna put clothes on your child’s back

It’s not knowing where you gonna lay your head down every night

And not knowing when your money situation is going to get right

Just to know whether or not they’re going to cut off your lights

Struggling

It’s when you’re dropping to your knees

Begging god please

To take you out of your misery

Because you know this aint how your life was meant to be

It’s having to drink warm water because you don’t have a freezer to make you a couple pieces of ice

It’s about scrounging up your pennies just to get you a bag of Uncle Ben’s rice

Struggling

Is having to dodge the repo man for the past 7 years of your life

Let me tell you a little something about struggling

It’s about having to move out of housing because someone snitched that you had a second part-time job

It’s about doing hair, cleaning houses, and having yard sales just to get by

It’s about not being able to sleep at night because you got 50 million bills on your mind

Struggling

Is not being able to drive your car until payday because the little red gas light is on

It’s about rummaging through your dresser drawers just to see what you can pawn

It’s about humming your own melodies because you can’t afford to buy the bootleg CD to listen to the song

Struggling

Is even thinking about taking on a roommate to help pay the bills even though you got kids in the home

It’s about walking around in the wintertime with a runny nose because you can’t afford to put a skully on your dome

Struggling is trying to call every place you stay your home

Let me tell you a little something about struggling

It’s having to smack the tv to try to keep the picture on the screen

Of course it involves standing in the line to get that government cheese

And yes you’ll be out on the street begging for change, PLEASE

Struggling

Is trying to do some extra chores when you want to bum some food stamps

It’s about lighting up the house with one single lamp

It’s about looking in your closet at the same two pair of black pants

Let me tell you a little something about struggling

So you know why I’m so proud of what I’ve become

 

 

 

 

 

 

We as individuals judge others before looking at ourselves. Nobody is perfect, but we expect everybody to be perfect. All SINS are equal, so everyday we all should be asking for forgiveness. I admit that I am not perfect, and I know that I will never be perfect.

        I’m Not Perfect

 

 

What do you think

Of course I drink

No I’m not a saint

Yes I fornicate

I don’t know what’s in me

I’m full of envy

What do you think is worse

How I spit or how I curse

Look me in my eyes

I can’t help but to lie

Many tears I have cried

For my thoughts of suicide

No I’m not great

I love but I hate

What’s the big deal

Every now and then I steal

No need to befriend me

Because my heart is so stingy

No I’m not complete

Sometimes I have to cheat

I don’t see this as a need

But I have thought about that weed

So what’s the whole purpose

To show you I’m not perfect

Sometimes people underestimate us because we are quiet and stay to ourselves. They expect us to be loud, aggressive, and boastful to ensure that we have what it takes. When the truth is you don't have to overcompensate to show them  who you are. When it comes down to it actions speak louder than words.

Deception

  

My tears are not weak

They make way for my strength

My thoughts are not bound

I say exactly what I meant

My voice may sound soft

It just eases the truth

My mind is not young

I just savor my youth

I may resist confrontation

I don’t like to waste my power

Sometimes I take your crap

So you call me a coward

I sit in the back

Because hate is in the front

I don’t take what you give

Because it’s not what I want

I reach for the peak

I can’t resist a challenge

You think I am worthless

You can’t handle my talent

 

A Great Woman

There are many reasons why men look at us women differently than we view ourselves. If we don't present to them the way that we feel inside then they will continually judge our book by it's cover. If you don't show a man how you want to be treated, then  you will never gain the respect that is yours. So let's be great women and present ourselves with pride and respect.

A Great Woman

　

Behind every great man stands a great woman

This is an understatement, a mistake, a misunderstanding

Everybody knows that

Because there is no way I’m following behind you

One, two, or however many steps

The only step up you have on me is when you step up to open the door

So I can walk through

And you know I’m speaking the truth

I do have the option to stand in front of you

But a lot of time I choose to stand by your side

But never behind

Yes you are known as a provider, but I can provide too

And a lot of times it seems as though I’m the one providing for you

You are supposed to be the driver

Yet you always want me to drive

And in rough times, you are supposed to carry me

But I choose to walk

Baby you are never about it

All you do is talk

Nonsense that I never understand

Tell me again the reason as to why I should stand behind a man

Who could care less whether or not he treats me unfair

But I’ll tell you this

I Don’t Care

And I will wear my heels, look sexy, be proud, and stand tall

And believe me or not I can be that one without balls

They aint nothing but a hand magnet when you feel you have to prove your manhood

And even though I don’t have them

I wouldn’t grab on them if I could

I’m more of a woman than you will ever think I am

I’m not just here to cook your mac and cheese, collard greens and candied yams

I’m here to be your soul mate

And not your do what I say girl

Making love to a man is not the only thing that satisfies my world

I like to feed my intellect and achieve my goals

No matter how much you may think of us as bitches and hoes

I’m here, and I’m here for a reason

And lately it seems that a lot of men are only in my life for a season

But that’s not something that makes me feel that I am less of a woman

It shows me that I am too much of a woman

Because not just any man can handle the fire that I possess

His love beats for me

But it’s too much for his chest

So he needs a rest, to digest, the best

That he has ever had

And I don’t care if you get a little uneasy

Because I am a great woman

And I will never stand behind anyone

So you better believe me

Because beside every Great Man stands a Great Woman

Always

　

This Smile Was Never Yours

As individuals we allow the hearts to slip away from the one's we love, not realizing that someone else has already been preparing to catch it once it falls. Sometimes in relationships we get complacent. We don't take the extra effort for the smile that used to mean everything to us.

This Smile was Never Yours

　

Yeah I’m grinning from cheek to cheek

But it’s not because of what you said today

But because of what he’s been saying all week

He’s been feeding my mind and loving my soul

He’s been digging my ditches and filling my holes

He’s been touching my heart and rubbing my toes

But I guess that’s something you don’t know

Or even heard of

With your inconsistent half-stepping love

He’s been giving me 100% and he’s not even here

You should be more than nervous

I mean you should be scared

Because he’s taking my love piece by piece

It’ll be only a matter of time before I will be released

From the grip that has been loosened from around my heart

It’s kind of hard to love someone when you’re both in the dark

You will never change, this I have finally realized

So I will take full blame because it took me so long to open my eyes

Your magic stick just doesn’t glow like it used to

I hate to say it but sex is not even part of the issue

Truth of the matter is I was never your queen

I was just some girl that lost her way into your daydream

And now I finally see the light that will guide me back to reality

And he’s not helping your favor because he’s saying all the things you never said

And he’s pleasing me when we’re not even in bed

And I know this right here is messing with your head

But I’m not gonna settle when I can love him instead

And I know I’ve been cheesing while walking through your door

But pretty soon you’re gonna find out that this smile was Never yours

God Has A Plan For Me

Always know that God has a plan for you. A lot of times we feel that our past is the main thing that affects our future, when in reality you can make yourself a better future. Sometimes you have to go through storms in your past so that you can appreciate your future. Never let your past hold you back. God may even delay you so that he can build you up to where he wants you to be, so don't dreail from God because you don't know where he is taking you, just learn how to move forward and God will make a way. It took me a long time to realize that God had a plan for me.

God Has A Plan For Me

Yeah I may not have the job that my bachelor’s degree should have achieved

But that doesn’t mean that I should lose my pride and tell everyone that I didn’t succeed

You may misunderstand my smile

But that’s because you don’t know that God Has A Plan For Me

And who cares if I had to go back home for days, months, and weeks

And It’s okay that right now I don’t have a dental plan to take care of my teeth

And you may think I’m crazy because I’m laughing

But that’s because you don’t know that God Has A Plan For Me

And yes it’s still going to take me another year to pay off my car

And no I don’t have my own house with a big back yard

And you’re curious as to why I still hold my head up high

But that’s because you don’t know that God Has A Plan For Me

No I don’t have money stashed away in a savings account

And who cares if I don’t know what not living check to check is all about

And it’s amazing to you that everyday I don’t cry

But that’s because you don’t know that God Has A Plan For Me

So what if I can’t go out every week and buy me a new pair of sneaks

And it’s not my fault that I’m mailing out a new bill every single week

And you’re still wondering why a smile fills up my cheeks

But that’s because you don’t know that God Has A Plan For Me

And yes I still get my food off the dollar menu at Wendy’s

And no I aint never ever wore anything that said Prada or Fendi

And you shake your head because I happily rock my Payless shoes

But that’s because you don’t know that God Has A Plan For Me

And so what if I don’t make that many trips just so I won’t have to spend money on gas

And yeah I write checks just to make me feel like my money actually lasts

And you’re not sure why I’m still having fun

But that’s because you don’t know that God Has A Plan For Me

Because you didn’t see me picking up this pen and pad

And you didn’t see me writing down rhymes that you didn’t know I had

And you didn’t see me staring at the computer screen 4 to 5 times a week

You may not have known, but I knew that God Had A Plan For Me

　

　

We as individuals are always quick to point out all the bad that someone has done to us, but never the good. But when you have a good thing you have to let them know in your own way. Sometimes it takes the bad to appreciate the good, and I definitely appreciate the good that I have.

His

　

He’s like a breath of fresh air

My cloud over my sun

I drift into his arms

I lay my head on his chest

His smile fills my horizon

He’s like a tall glass of ice water

An umbrella in the rain

I cling to his strength

His laugh tickles my heart

I’m lost in his baby face

He’s like the combination to my safe

The band around my money

I rub my hand across his close cut

I grin at his eyes

I drown in his gaze

I confide in his heart

He’s like the socks on my cold feet

The time on my watch

I bathe in his mind

I hide in his soul

He’s like a candle that lights my room

The wine in my glass

I’m shook by his touch

Engulfed in his sweat

I’m locked by his attention

He’s like the ring on my finger

The polish on my nails

I grab his hand

I kiss his lips

I detect his love

And only his