Letter To Dad

Letter to Dad

 

So Dad

Where do I start

How about with I underestimated you

I just knew the day you left

Would be the last time I saw you

It took some time to get used to

An empty home because your presence filled it to completion

But when you deleted your love

It took your 6 year old baby girl through withdrawals

Anxious at every turn of the door knob

Hoping to see your face

Secretly wishing I was in a dream that I couldn’t wake up from

Tried not to showcase my feelings even though my heart was numb

You weren’t there to monitor the deterioration in its beating

It finally stopped because the thoughts of your last words

Kept repeating in my head

Curled up in my bed

Wondering why you would leave me behind

It took years to find out that it wasn’t intentional

The bottle was detrimental in keeping us apart

Filling your body with false satisfaction

And your heart following through with the wrong actions

Most men would have folded and threw in their cards

You decided to charge your way back into our lives

Worked hard to redirect all of your wrongs into the right direction

And even though you relapsed back to neglection

You still came back

Buried your pride and dismantled your ego

Took steps to regrow the love

That almost withered up and died

Watered it as much as needed to bring it back to life

I know I called you out more than an umpire

But you were still able to provide what was needed to help rewire my heart

Started to put back the pieces your absence charred off

Turned it into an at all costs endeavor

Proved that with time anything can get better

Hard not to remember the pain

Noting that it helped to build the woman you see before you today

I appreciate your effort

Glad I could be one of the reasons you didn’t give up

Willing to push through the negative stares for us

You lost your way just like we all do

No need to sit around and point the blame at you

I’d much rather congratulate your perseverance

And the fact that you made an attempt to be a better parent

Which is more than what I can say for some people in this world

Who toss their baby girls to the side never to return

You may not know this 

But you have applied new meaning to my life

Showed me the true value of the saying try until you can’t try

So I

Say Thank You dad

For trying and not giving up

For enduring when I know you are only so tough

For sacrificing the bottle for us

For that you have forever earned my love

Sincerely

Your Baby Girl